Edited by Larkspur

Chapter 30: A Long Discussion in Confidence (Part 1)

What was he angry about?

Qin Yi lowered his eyes. She did not know what he was thinking about, she waited for a while and when she did not receive his reply, she raised her head surprised, “What is wrong with you?”

Qin Yi woke up from his thoughts. He spoke without any expression, “Nothing. I just felt that it is fortunate that you are born in the Marquis residence. If you were born in the Imperial family, you would have reincarnated early on.”

“Hey. You…” Chu Jin Yao was angry. She glared at him before discovering that this person’s brows did not even move one bit. She puffed up in anger, but when she thought that if she was born into the Imperial family, she indeed would not be one that could live well and her anger was in vain, “Forget about it, you are right. It is fortunate that ZuMu is fair and reasonable. It is alright for me to be stubborn with her, but if it was in another family, one would not imagine how I would be punished for contradicting the elders like this.”

“It is good that you know that.” Qin Yi said unhappily. After a while, he added, “Next time when you are wronged by others, hold your anger back first, yield and apologise to the elders first. After the elders’ anger subsides, you should clarify the truth. There were so many people at that time, so when you did not yield and stuck your neck out, other than suffering from beatings, what good would that be?”

“I understand the logic, but at that time I was wronged by Chu Jin Miao. It is fine if it was others, but when it comes to Chu Jin Miao, I just don’t want to yield and make her feel pleased about herself.” She continued, “Moreover, I was not wrong at all.”

When Qin Yi looked at Chu Jin Yao, in a trance, he seemed to see the scene that day when several cabinet minsters came to the Eastern Palace to earnestly talk to him with well-intentioned advice, “Your Highness, please bear with it and yield to His Majesty and Her Highness. We all know that you are right. When His Majesty’s anger has passed, this official will advice His Majesty and seek justice for Your Highness.”

What had he said then? He too had said, “I, Qin Yi, am not considered to a gentleman, but would never regret what was done. Since he dared to allow the palace maid to beat the drums in front of all civil and military officials, did he have the image of a Monarch and a father? And still he dares to dislike not being given face. It is impossible for me to admit my wrongdoing for trumped-up charges.”

When the cabinet minister heard this, he almost fainted in shock and even if the rest spoke good things around him tremblingly, he was not the slightest softened. Unexpectedly, it was Qin Yi’s turn to play the role of the ‘cabinet minister’.

Chu Jin Yao suddenly discovered a very light smile on Qin Yi’s lips that had a biting coldness to it. She asked curiously, “What are you smiling about?”

“It is nothing.” Qin Yi said lightly, “It’s just that I have remembered my teacher. I finally understood their emotions at that time. It is a pity that it has been too long.”

Chu Jin Yao felt that the current Qin Yi was very strange. Her instincts told her that he did not like others to ask about these things, but she could not just ignore him, thus she could only ask softly, “Are you alright?”

Qin Yi turned back and saw Chu Jin Yao’s large eyes filled with worry and also hesitation as they looked at him. Her eyes were dark and bright and as they focus at him intently, there was only Qin Yi’s faint reflection in them. It was as if there was nothing else that mattered under Heavens. The waves in Qin Yi’s heart calmed down miraculously that he did not notice that the undercurrent in his eyes had also subsided. It was filled with a gentle light as he spoke to Chu Jin Yao, “I am fine.”

Qin Yi suddenly had an urge, even if it exposed his identity, he did not care less. He asked Chu Jin Yao, “Do you still remember the Crown Prince?”

Chu Jin Yao was stunned for a moment. Why did he suddenly talk about this? She smiled, “Of course, I remember. That time Father had said that the Crown Prince had offended the Empress and was still in DaTong.”

“He overestimated his capabilities and struck a stone with an egg. Actually he is as stupid as you.”

Chu Jin Yao felt complicated at those words. “You are sure powerful that with one sentence you can offend two people. No. It is not two people. You have offended the entire court of officials! It is fine for you to talk about me because I too feel that I am stubborn and stupid but the Crown Prince is different. He dared to shoot and kill the favoured maid in front of everybody and even risked offending the Emperor and the Empress just to uphold the prestige of the country and lift the army’s morale. How can a brave action like this be called stupid?”

Qin Yi smiled, “Maybe he did that because he felt the Emperor and Empress would not punish him severely and could also avenge his private wrongs using public environment in passing. Why would he not do it?”

“You always think about the bad side of people.” Chu Jin Yao was very worried and began to educate Qin Yi, “You cannot be like this. Although it is said that the affairs of the world are fickle, one should always think about the good in everything. Like this your heart will feel comfortable and will also view matters positively, so that good things can continuously happen. You are more comprehensive in your thoughts so why can you not understand this simple logic? You are accustomed to thinking towards the negative side when you encounter things. Even though this can indeed prevent many accidents, but in the long run, the pressure in your heart would increase. Won’t you collapse under the weight of it?”

Qin Yi found it funny and could not help but laugh, “Are you teaching me a lesson?”

Chu Jin Yao said seriously, “Don’t laugh! Don’t think that because I am a female, you can view my words lightly. I am saying it for your good. In the future, when you leave me, you will still encounter many people and events. If you still continue to be like this and keep everything in your heart and constantly think everything carefully, you will definitely wear yourself down sooner or later. You are obviously very smart and can learn everything very quickly so why do you like to erect thorns around yourself? You will be very tired like this.”

“Tired?” Qin Yi looked at Chu Jin Yao and spoke mercilessly, “Only a young lady like you that is raised in deep boudoir can say such things naively. Which person under Heavens is not tired? Who does not curry favour and take big actions for that little gain? For the Imperial family, it is about status and power, for the court officials, it is about reputation and career, for merchants, it is for wealth and fame. It is like this for all under Heavens. Even your residence of Marquis Chang Xing. Just for a small little position of a study companion for a County Princess, it is like one is rivalling a great enemy. Isn’t it all for the extension of the Marquis Chang Xing title? In the end, everyone under Heavens is the same. It is just that some people would say it out and some would refuse to admit it.”

He was splitting hairs again. Chu Jin Yao could only speak to him softly, “You speak logically. Water flows downhill, whereas people walk upwards. Everybody wants to live a better life. You look at me, raised in a farmer family since young but currently in a Marquis residence. It is said that one returns to one’s biological parents’ side but in fact, is it not because of the Marquis residence’s wealth? If the Chu family were a normal farmer family, how could there be so many things?”

At those words,Qin Yi was displeased for no reason. He frowned and said, “Don’t talk about yourself like this…”

“Listen to me first.” Chu Jin Yao interrupted him before continuing, “There is nothing bad to admit to it. You have seen that I have returned and ZuMu has acknowledged me but did not let Chu Jin Miao leave. First, the Marquis residence could not lose face. Second, it is because the Chu family is rich and does not care about raising an extra young lady. Everybody under Heavens is as such, everyone wants to live better a bit. Chu Jin Miao created so many things so that she herself can go higher. I have never blamed her for being as such. If a person does not have ambition, I will then look down upon them. I don’t like her because she does not conduct matters in an upright manner. There is no wrong in scheming for your benefit, but it is wrong to harm other for oneself. You said that everyone under Heavens would move according to their gains, this is indeed correct. But you cannot not see the genuine feelings in the human world because of human’s selfishness. When I was in the Su family, I had to wake up earlier in the cold winter and use ice cold well water to wash clothes. They deliberately changed my identity and yet treated me like this. Do I hate them? I naturally hate them but at the same time I have to admit that most of the Su family are bad, whereas Older Sister would use her own methods to take care of me. She, in fact, knew of my identity and the details of it! One cannot deny everyone just because one person is bad. Even if the entire world is hypocritical and selfish, you have to look at the portion of people that treat you well!”